BACKGROUND INFORMATION ON FRIENDSFIRST

A SERVICE FOR SINGLE CHRISTIANS OF ALL AGES

• The idea for friendsfirst came from the St. Johns Church (Harborne, Birmingham) weekend away in September 1999 where our speaker Elaine Storkey challenged the church to assist single people in finding partners.
• There is a huge number of single Christians in the UK, who are single either because their work commitments/social lives are not conducive to meeting sufficient Christians of the opposite sex (apart from often limited numbers of contemporaries in their own churches), or because of other personal circumstances like divorce, separation or widowhood for the older age groups.
• Many ‘single’ people look to friendship/dating agencies nowadays to find soul mates. A dedicated Christian service is vitally important to enable Christians to find others who share their Christian beliefs. Without access to this sort of service many Christians will seek soul mates who may not share their beliefs and this can easily lead to difficulties later on.

VERIFICATION AND SUPPORT

friendsfirst was established with the support of Christian leaders in Birmingham like The Reverend Canon John Hughes (St. John’s, Harborne), The Reverend James Langstaff, Bishop Jo Aldred (Executive Director of The Centre for Black and White Christian Partnership), and Reverend Brian Nicholls (General Superintendent of the West Midlands Area of the Baptist Union of Great Britain). It also has the support of theologian and sociologist, Elaine Storkey.

THE friendsfirst CONCEPT

friendsfirst is an information service for single Christians across the UK.  It is based in the Midlands and is run exclusively by Christians for Christians (i.e. those people who associate themselves with a mainline Christian denomination).

It is open to unattached Christians of all denominations and ages and welcomes people from a wide variety of backgrounds and traditions.  It is a friendly and professionally run service which puts its members at the heart of everything it does. It is a membership organisation with annual membership fees.

The service is run on the simple basis of allowing people to make contact and friends with other people whose details they have seen and like the look of.  friendsfirst believes that friendships are vitally important and are at the heart of any good and meaningful relationship. friendsfirst recognizes that in today’s world, where people’s working and social lives are not necessarily enabling them to meet new friends or potential long term partners, some Christians can either face involuntary singleness or long term relationships with people who don’t share their deepest desires and beliefs. In addition, many older people are isolated and for many reasons find it difficult to join the sorts of networks that would enable them to make like-minded friends. 

THE PROCESS

All members write a brief but concise summary of themselves which is then circulated to other members within appropriate age and geographical bandings.  A variety of means of contacting other members is available, for example, contact through box numbers, administered by friendsfirst, to provide confidentiality of details to either/both parties until both parties are comfortable to release them.

There is no intention to matchmake - people are free to make their own selections based on the information which is provided to them regularly through the continually updated profiles. friendsfirst offers a service that puts members in control and avoids the embarrassment of interviews, blind dates, awkward situations etc.  Members have the choice how and when to take things forward.  There is no pressure.  They meet who they choose, when they choose, how they choose. friendsfirst provides much valued support to members for all aspects of membership as and when required.

SECURITY

For members security and reassurance, all applicant members are asked to provide some form of identification that validates that they are who they say they are.

Box numbers for correspondence between members are provided in the profiles for security reasons. However members are able to provide other members with their telephone number and email, so that they can be contacted directly if they so wish. Since some members may be well known in their local area there is the option to be referred to in the profiles by a nickname.

friendsfirst holds members details on computer and is registered with the Data Protection Register. 

Katharine Gray

   friendsfirst Director